We´re coming close to the end of the year and it seems like the perfect time to reflect, analyze and get some insight from what we’ve experienced and of course, hopefully end 2023 on a high note, with renewed enthusiasm and optimism.

Nevertheless, we´re still finding ourselves in the middle of difficult and weird times as a collective, since the pandemic started and each one of us, as an individual, could have experienced different situations, ups and downs and it could seem daunting to go back and check what´s happened: taking in the positive, the neutral and the negative and use it as a foundation to build upon, instead of feeling defeated, regretful or complacent.

How to find the balance and start a new year with our hearts full of hope?

Let´s star reflecting on what´s happened in 2023.

If you wrote any resolutions, goals or plans at the beginning of the year, this is the time to go back to them and check the following:

Classify them into :
physical –self
emotional and mental-self
work- related goals
relationships
spiritual-self
community and your surroundings
new habits, hobbies or ventures

Check your motivation and desires behind each of those when you wrote them down
Check how many you have put into action.
What results have you gotten for every one of the seven areas mentioned above?
Did they meet your expectations?
What could have you done differently to achieve different results?

After this, take some time to observe with openness, non-judgement and from an objective perspective.

If your results meet or exceed your expectations, it’s a moment to rejoice and acknowledge your effort and hard work.

If on the other hand, your goals or plans look quite different from reality, it’s time to offer yourself some compassion and forgiveness and observe with clear awareness if the overall results are a consequence of external factors, out of your control, such as the direct effects of the pandemic, or if some of them could have been influenced by your own actions, attitudes, the time you allocated to your projects and whatever your prioritize and how honest and diligent you were working towards achieving what was important to you.

The idea is not to engage in self- criticism or self- hatred; quite the opposite.

What I recommend is:

Observe with openness and a non-judgmental attitude. Observe and see things as they are, without adding to them a subjective value.
Once you´ve observed your reality, acknowledge the positive outcomes you´ve achieved. It doesn´t matter how small they could seem. If you have achieved something small, such as drinking more water, being more grateful, becoming more resilient, handling the challenges whilst taking care of your stress levels, whatever it may be, ALL of us can find at least ONE little thing that has made a positive impact in our lives, the lives of those around us or our environment. Something important to remember: It’s not relevant at this point that this outcome or achievement wasn´t included in your 2021 Goals or Resolutions. It could have been something you didn´t plan, but that has offered you some happy moments, peace or comfort or that has made you feel closer to your loved ones. Life doesn´t always go as planned and there are wonderful and surprising things that come our way, even when we don´t plan them.
To give you an example, I’ve always considered myself pretty bad at anything hand-made or crafts. I needed help with my home-economics homework! I could never knit or mend anything. But we got a sewing machine end of August and we’ve started to learn how to sew. It´s been an amazing discovery and a learning experience. It´s a whole new world. I didn´t expect that besides the technical knowledge, the new terms, the precision and such, we would need to learn about creativity, patience and how to re-do and try and try again and again. I´ve come to appreciate even more all the work required to assemble something and all the people and resources that go behind the simplest of garments. I appreciate and value the craft and have become more aware of our impact and responsibility as consumers. And it´s even more gratifying the fact that we’ve been able to sew a few hats, duvets and garments, with such limited knowledge and resources. That´s why I definitely think that you can find something positive to be thankful for in 2021.
Before going to the goals and plans that weren’t as successful, we need to do a little bit of soul searching and clarify our core values. These values are the ones that give your life, dreams and actions a framework and sense of purpose. Core values are your fundamental beliefs, and could be related to your traits or behavior, or rights and causes.

Core values could include, in a list from a to z:

Gratitude
Love
Kindness
Loyalty
Helping and service
Family
Reliability
Perseverance
Animal rights
Authenticity
Compassion
Concern for others
Courage
Enthusiasm
Friendliness
Good humor
Adventure
Honesty
Optimism
Open-mindedness
Altruism
Environmentalism
Philanthropy
Justice
Tolerance
Freedom

Even if our habits, behavior or tendencies change over time, as they normally do, our core values tend to stay more stable throughout our lives, giving us an anchor and north whenever we’re faced with big or even small challenges and decisions to make. It’s important to review your core values and make sure your goals align with them and that we aren’t just following what others suggest, what’s expected from us in society or what we think we should do and emphasize the need to stay true to ourselves.
Now it´s time to explore the goals or ventures that haven´t gone according to plan. For this purpose, let´s break them down focusing on:

Are they still relevant and in accordance with your core values?
If they are, how can we reframe them in a constructive way and focus on the little things we can start doing now to move towards our goal.
If they aren´t relevant to us anymore or if they deviate from our core values, it’s okay to accept that we’re changing as everything around us. We can let go if necessary. But don’t let go of something meaningful or very beneficial to you or those around you just because the task seems too demanding and you feel it’d be too difficult to achieve. It’s very important to remember that we need to be honest with ourselves and use our wisdom to differentiate whatever it’s completely out of our control and what we can influence with our actions and attitudes. Change is uncomfortable, even if it’s for good, so don’t get discouraged or overwhelmed by something challenging. It it’s worth pursuing, perseverance is the only way to go.
Restate or create new goals and plans, trying to break them down into little chunks and state them as SMART goals:

Specific: Instead of writing “I want to get healthier”, try “I’ll incorporate walking into my daily routine from Monday to Friday”.
Measurable: “I’ll walk for 15 minutes during my lunch break”.
Attainable: “You have realized you can get it 15 minutes of walking during lunch instead of social media, without any problem at all”.
Relevant: “This little changes will improve your mood and make you less prone to a sedentary lifestyle”.
Time-based: You set an alarm on weekdays and can go back to work without any hurry. You walk for 15 minutes during your lunchbreak”.

After going through your new goals, don’t forget to include at least one for the main areas of your life, being as realistic and honest as possible regarding your priorities, core values, financial situation, amount of free time and responsibilities.

The main areas are:

Physical self
Mental and emotional self
Spiritual component or self- growth
Work, studies and learning
Relationships and community

I wouldn’t advise to create an extensive list of goals at the beginning, even if you feel extra motivated to do so, but rather focus on one per area and work on it for at least 3 months. Once you’ve established new habits, created new routines and feel confident and comfortable with them, you can either increase frequency, intensity or level of challenge in one or two of your goals or go back to a “back-up list” and incorporate one at a time.

Even if it’s seems like underachieving, habits that stick take time and effort to do so and it’s better to look back and realize that you’ve completely changed your life and habits in one or two areas than fail in a bunch of impossible tasks.

But that’s just my perception. You do what’s best for you 😉

To finish the year on a high note,

I would go deep into gratitude and select 5 to things I´m grateful for. If it’s possible to extend your gratitude to the ones involved, it’s always a good idea to express how thankful you are and show your appreciation. If you’re grateful for something that involves too many people or if it is something intangible, you can always find a way to give back, choosing a close recipient, someone you don’t know or supporting a charity or any cause close to your heart.

In order to make your goals and motivations more tangible, I strongly recommend to write them down, either on a notebook, poster or diary you can constantly refer to, so you can keep them in mind and keep track of them too.

If you prefer to have all your information digitally, either on your laptop or cellphone, by all means, do so. Whatever works best for you.

I have to confess though that I´m rather old- fashioned in this area and I do prefer writhing things by hand and more than anything, having some sort of visual reminder every day, which keeps me motivated and avoids getting off track whenever life gets in the middle.

I also recommend having some follow-up sessions with yourself during the year, at least once a month and every 3 months. That way, you can always make adjustments, asses what’s going right and acknowledge your little victories and correct what needs improvement.

By keeping yourself accountable, you make your goals and core values truly a priority. Therefore, your actions and decisions will genuinely reflect the deepest desires of your heart.

My final advice is:

Choose a day and find an activity or environment that allows you to introspect and find serenity within. If because of your hectic holiday schedule and responsibilities you find it impossible to have a full day for this purpose, I´d find at least a couple hours during the weekend. We will devote this time to mindful contemplation, silence and calm. Nature offers a wonderful opportunity to find peace and contentment, to just be.

We can practice some silent meditation, loving kindness, walking meditation or any other practice that seems appropriate and comforting. I have many of this explained in other blog entries or videos on my Youtube channel, Instagram and Facebook, so feel free to check them out if you want to. Also, we go deep into mindfulness and self-compassion practices, mindful eating and music therapy in our group courses and private sessions, so these could also be a great opportunity if you want to incorporate new habits and transform your life holistically and you feel you benefit the most from a structured format and the guidance of a professional.

I truly believe there’s always more good than wrong as long as we still breathe, there’s always room for change and improvement, there’s always magic, love and kindness around us. There’s always light and music, there’s always peace and calmness, even after the longest, darkest and scariest night of thunder.

Let’s not forget the simple wonders of life and embrace the ending of the year with optimism and gratefulness and open ourselves to new chapters, new opportunities.

I encourage you to try these tips and join me next year for all the surprises I’m planning for you in this wonderful self-growth journey.

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Thank you for being part of our Mindfulness, Music and Health family. It means the world to me to be able to connect with such kind souls from so many different corners of the world. I´m so grateful for you all.

Here´s to ending 2023 on a high note and starting the new year with peace and content at heart. May the New Year bring you all the wonderful things and genuine happiness.

How to end 2023 on a high note